A New Era

It seems like yesterday that I was young and fresh. Now, I say this like I am a grouchy middle-aged lady, but the truth is that the early and mid twenties are long over, and it feels even longer ago that I was a wide-eyed teenager. Where had all the time gone in the blink of an eye? 

I see myself evolving from day to day. And at this point in time, in my late twenties, sometimes I wonder if I have gained anything in life besides a medical degree, more lines, thinning hair and a ton of weight. 

The one thing I am sure that I have gained, however, is a tasteful sense of style. Don't get me wrong, I may not be Tatler Magazine's Woman of the Year or Fashionista of the Month, and not everyone shares a similar taste in my clothes, but I pride myself on not being tacky. 

Or, perhaps, it is just that I am probably 5 kg heavier than I was when I was 16, and there is no way a person of my height and weight and well past the age of 18 could pull of micro minis, plunging halter tops and strappy sandals any longer. These days, it makes me uncomfortable to appear in a hemline higher than above my knees, and I rarely appear in anything strapless or a halter neckline. My wardrobe is completely obsolete with any tops that need a zillion stringy bits tying together and it makes me uncomfortable when a hint of cleavage starts showing in any tops. 

It also helps that these days, I am meant to be a professional who is busy saving lives and nobody would want their doctor to turn up looking like a hooker. 

Last year I was obsessed with lace. I still am, don't get me wrong. 

This year, I discovered the wrap dress. 

I have long been a fan of Diane von Fursternbug. The only problem was that I could not afford anything from DvF because I was no lady of leisure and a poor aspiring doctor who has yet to pass the membership exams could never afford DvF on a regular basis. 

So I surfed. And made a mental note to hunt down high street alternatives. 

I love how this brightly coloured piece is demure yet striking at the same time. Totally screams power dressing all over.

I LOVE this piece. The take on a short sleeved wrap dress is something that I have yet to see and it screams versatility all over.

And finally, who can resist mesh sheer polka-dotted sleeves? 

Sigh. Sometimes I wonder if I would have been better off as a personal shopper or some kind of fashionista who had her own clothes boutique rather than the struggling aspiring cardiologist that I am now. It makes me wonder how my flair for piecing together outfits comes so naturally even when I am late for work and rushing to just throw on the first few pieces I see, whereas in contrast it takes so much for me to remember medical facts, tiny details, make sure I don't mess up at work....and on top of all that, claw everyone out of my way to the top. 

If it takes so much for me to even pass my membership exams and stay focused, I wonder if my whole life is going to filled with stress, a feeling of emptiness and dreariness AND still not be able to reach the top or even fulfil my distant dream of being a Cardio God. 

Why couldn't things be as simple as I thought they were when I was 16? Why couldn't I just have all the things I thought I would when I imagined myself at this age? 

At this point in time, it looks like I will end up looking as haggard as a rag from the exhaustion of mugging for my MRCP, stressing over on calls and work AND I would still end up not being a Cardio God and NOT having a Prince Charming of any kind to prevent me from drowning under all this pressure. 

Oh well.