Indomitable

When I was younger, I had always prided myself on my steadfastness and my dead resolution to achieve whatever I wanted.

I had a whiteboard and marker where I wrote down potential marks to aim for before every examination in school. And then I would make sure that I topped them all without fail.

This week, I have felt my energy faltering as every single day goes by. It is a dilemma really, between wanting the weekend to come quickly and wishing that it would not do so because I am running out of time to complete my Work Based Assessments. It seems strange that the smallest things can set me off, and today I just reached my maximal threshold. I am dead tired, mentally, from the amount of information I have yet to ingest in this Paediatrics attachment, and how my mind cannot seem to flip easily from dealing with as normal a condition as a respiratory infection in an adult, to dealing with one in a kid.

It is one thing to just continuously say that little children are not my thing, and I would still prefer to manage adults as my patients rather than kids, but at this point I don't think I have a choice of sub-specialising as a student, and I hate it when I underperform by my own standards - although I should have probably become used to that by now being the most mediocre medical student amidst a sea of brilliant others.

But it is just not as easy anymore to excel in my medicine as to achieve 100% in that Math exam.

To be fair, it might just be my sudden dip in mood and hormonal imbalance that is bringing about these swings in emotion.

But it just makes me wonder time and time again if I actually possess the willpower and strength to go as far as I have aspired to be through this lengthy journey of doctoring. Not even to be that world class surgeon in my dreams, but just to get med school over and done with and survive being a junior doctor.

I am not even sure that I have sufficiently transitioned from being a good student who had pretty decent grades in High School into a medical student with the enthusiasm and potential to learning doctoring skills, lest even a junior doctor who can complete the smooth transition between just taking a stab at the right diagnosis to making proper management plans.

It is strange how at most times, I feel that I am able to put on the strongest front just to make sure nothing can bother me in the slightest way, yet there are times like these that make me wonder aloud, when the last time was that I actually felt truly happy and satisfied with my life itself.

But the only way to go now is just to put one foot in front of the other and move forward. And hang on to this new ethos of mine:

'The world breaks everyone, and afterwards, some are strong at the broken places.'

- Ernest Hemingway

And just be....indomitable, as such. After all, whatever doesn't kill you....

Right?

Navigating Notting Hill

And what else in that trendy area of West London, if not the renown market along Portobello Road.

Growing up as a teenager, I had swooned over the 'Boy Meets Girl, and despite the most different of circumstances, Boy Falls in Love with Girl' concept depicted in the movie 'Notting Hill'. I had been smitten with Hugh Grant's easy charm and British accent, and had loved the chemistry he and Julia Roberts put across on screen.

I had daydreamed about this scene on the park bench, and remembered it till this day. Unfortunate (or perhaps fortunate??) to say, it has yet to happen.

And who could forget their eventful encounter in that famous Travel Bookshop along Portobello Road that had sparked the start of all this.

So it was customary that Lynn, YL and I decided to pay a visit to the Road that had made such a distinct mark on my girly daydreams.

No blue door (if you remember in the movie, the blue door on the house belonging to Hugh Grant), but who can resist this brilliant shade of a pink!!! Beats the blue door any day!

Definitely one of the trendier areas of London I had seen so far. The shops were quirky, and so were the little bits and bops that were on sale.

One of the BIGGEST crowds I had ever seen as well, and that is saying something because I live in London and crowds are almost as common to me as pigeons. In fact, I am so used to overcrowded streets that leave pigeons no where to stand on the ground. But the crowd at Portobello Road.....that was possibly in a league of its own.

Obviously we didn't hold out very long amongst the excited antique / trinket- shoppers.

So we ended up here:

A good old cup of Latte and amazing Gelato. Nothing like a caffeine dose and a sugar high to end the day :)

Dri Dri - the gelato bar we were at. Thanks to Rex's recommendation and a prior visit there last year with her.

It's true what they say. London has such personality, such character. Two streets on, and you can find something that surprises you altogether.

And now that Spring is around the corner, hopefully there will be more exploring of these cobbled pathways of Londontown to come.

LFW #2

London Fashion Weekend - 2011.

After this amazing stint last year, there was no thinking twice about going again this year!

No Hanna aka Shopping Buddy aka 'Best Friend who willingly gets dragged by me to watch everything / go everywhere' this year =(

But there was a suitably efficient replacement in the form of Amiri.

And compared to the 'Kiasu Shopping' experience last year, where we were scrambling for time because of juggling the fashion show and hunting for the gift bags alongside browsing the numerous stalls, this year we opted for focusing. Important matters first. Time management skills - excellent.

Hence, no fashion show and no gift bags this year. Just browsing and shopping. And we were done and home by 9.30 pm. Yes, efficient much.

Managed very good steals this year again, perhaps more so than last year's frantic grabbing of clothes for the sake of making the trip my money's worth.

1) My pair of polka-dotted flats from French Sole by Jane Winkworth. Ballerina flats at their best :) Amazing steal from Original Retail Price and sooooo comfortable they possibly rival my loafers. And that's saying something!

2) Yellow chiffon blouse from Twenty 8 Twelve by Sienna Miller. Pretty much addicted to chiffon tops from LFW. I got a similar beige one last year from LFW as well. Hahahah. Oh well, perhaps my style is not as versatile as I thought after all.

3) Green Waist Belt from an independent designer which I love to bits. Although I have to say that their sizes are possibly skewed towards the graph of skinny people. Hmmm. Then again, aren't most clothes these days? *sigh*

Okay, this definitely concludes my shopping for this term. I think my overflowing wardrobe is saying alot for itself, and I have officially exhausted every single trend I have thought of trying out this season.

*And this is the sound of me SEALING my wallet shut*