"Let me tell you a secret, my dear.

I pretend that there is a pane of glass between myself and...them.

They can see me...but they cannot touch me."

Life on Hold

Today was a good day.

I have found the funniest movie buddies to replace my cuzzie. Hahaha. Strange why the ppl around us didn't think the movie was AS funny. Lol.

I haven't laughed so much in ages. Hahah.

Funny how I spent the whole week wishing for the weekend to be here so that I could spend my days hibernating only to be unable to sleep early on Friday night =P

OSCE and Test down, but still no pause in life. More mugging piling up and finals in a blink of an eye =P

And I don't even have time to rearrange my summer plans or book that Jkt flight and think about the possibility of a Melb trip.

So currently everything is on hold. So sorry. Haha.

Mafia-Themed

This is for you, Massachussetts. Hopefully it makes you miss me more ;)

xx

Couldn't think of an appropriate enough title for this one. Maybe because I initially wanted to mark the post down as 'The Day Shing dappled in Adventure Sports' but then I realised it was gonna be a mishmash of things (Haha, your word, Jenn).


So on this very glorious day, I went on a caving trip because I am a very nice person, and as Cheek kindly reminded with his 'puss in boots eyes', he and Sean were friends in need. Which is true enough, anyway. I felt sorry about the turn-out of the whole situation and decided trips like these were worth a try at least once in a lifetime anyway.


Let me reinstate that the day before, me and Michelle played pivotal roles in roping in last minute victims....oops, I meant people, to join the expedition. After much pleading to extents that almost saw me exhausting my persuasion skills, we managed to con 4 more ppl (one of which we automatically included) to join at the last minute. Unfortunately I realise that I probably can't do anymore of this because it would probably seem very hypocritical if I went around conning people to join trips in which I myself do not participate. Hur Hur.


This is getting too long. Argh. Anyway, all in all, the trip was....eye-opening and definitely a once in a lifetime experience for me. To say that I have developed a sudden love for Adventure sports would be pushing the limit, but I am glad that I went, even if the least there was to gain from it was discovering that I am a hopeless climber.....which wasn't the case, of course. There was much insight that I gained from it, from all angles. The structures were magnificent and the pitch black atmosphere was incredibly calming at times.


Unfortunately, a certain Japanese counterpart possibly owes me a new outfit from Yohji Yamamoto. Lol.


Back to the reality of mugging and catching up w tons of stuff, and practising for OSCE's now. ARGH. Which I have yet to do. Through karaoke moments like last night and 'adventurous moments' like this one, all in all, the clock is ticking. And I realise I have been abandoning my friends yet again. Sorry!


And also sorry for the previous cryptic post. It wasn't really meant to be cryptic, I just haven't gotten around to telling some people. Haha. Well, at the very least, one person knows what I'm talking about :)

Thanks for always being there, Niff. Through the mountain of complaints and more.


Will put some overdue pics up in the next entry

x

You remind me

It is strange how it materialised out of the blue....the tiny details that reminded me of you.

The Converse sneakers, the small mannerisms, the slightest of dressing details...even the glasses.

The only saving grace was that when he opened his mouth, his voice was as different to yours as night is to day.

Unfortunately, instead of nostalgia, emotion this time around arrived in the form of intense dislike, annoyance and distaste for everything he did.

Eventually, I realised that these were phantom images that I could choose to see or not to see. And with the growing guilt from the multitude of withering looks and snarky remarksI had thrown at the poor, clueless boy, I decided to let these deranged moments go.

On this totally un-emo note, I just find it amazing how things change in life. Heh.

Such as how you and I have come such a long way from being best friends to complete strangers.

PS: I know this blog is dead. Have some pics that I'm waiting for that I will update asap :)

Much Love~

V

Maybe ages has taken its toll on me, but auspicious 'holidays' seem even more overrated as of late.

I have undoubtedly turned into a sceptic :)

Yet, still....I felt the need to dedicate some shout-outs this year, even more than the last.

Niffy Utah heffaG17 heffaG2 Colour Chekkie Hanna RexyBabyy! NoemiDaJie Janey Voonie:

Thank You for your presence in my life. You have touched my heart in every possible way, saved me when I was sinking, brightened up the greyest of my days, and I am blessed indeed to have met you.

(There are, of course, a great many others who mean a great deal to me, mainly those of XY chromosomal orders, but to avoid fan clubs with cleavers outside my door, as of tradition, my V Day darlings will remain strictly female for obvious purposes ;))

Studying has taken its toll upon my daily life. Exhaustion is sinking in, when it really shouldn't be. Sometimes I feel like all the exuberance of my personality has withered drastically. As though the brighter side of me is a mere shadow of the past. Ah, well.

This week seems like such a long one.

Unbreakable

To helping fill the emptiness that loomed in the core every now and then

To listening, so patiently and unquestionably when I needed it most

To all the fun and laughter that echoed around me every minute of my life

To proving me otherwise when I thought my birthday was going to be the worst ever

This love is truly unbreakable :)

xxxx

Happy CNY everyone!

No Djoking Around....

.....was the personal message on my MSN nick after a tremendous mens finals at the Australian Open in Melbourne Park.

And after a huge blogging draught on my part, it actually inspired me to blog again!

Yes!! About tennis and my first time watching the Grand Slam tournament of Asia, the AO. Me, a tennis noob. Lol. A noob who is, currently, very much a fan, and to be more precise, very much a fan of THIS 20-yr-old:

Novak Djokovic. Fondly known as the 'Djoker', for his ability to mimic his fellow tennis players so brilliantly off court. He is absolutely hilarious! (Owed that trivia to Kel who is now my tennis guru hehe)

After watching Djokovic defeat Roger 'The King' Federer in straight sets at the semis on Friday, I became very much a fan of this Serbian youngster. Not only were his serves pin-point brilliant, he managed to remain fairly cool and worked the angles brilliantly, and in the end many of his aces did save him quite a bit.

But the finals was just hands-down brilliant beyond words, inevitably. I was aware before I watched it that it would be a tough match between the two. Unseeded as he was when he pranced on to Melbourne Park, Jo-Wilfried Tsonga is currenly ranked 18th in the world, but nothing in his drive, his pace and his strength at the tournament ever failed to indicate that he wasn't worthy to be on that stage.

Due to his uncanny resemblance to wrestling legend Muhammad Ali, they wrote this about him in Melbourne after he stunned Nadal:

"Volleys like a butterfly, aces like a bee"

(In comparison to Ali's 'Floats like a butterfly, stings like a bee')

After a much gruelling 2 and a half odd hours, during which there were countless nerve-wracking moments where I marvelled at Tsonga's crisp drop shots, his massive aces and the moments that Novak constantly misplaced his shots (well in the beginning anyway), it was a much deserved win (in my opinion).

Coming down from one set down to win the other two sets, the last of which was a heart-stopping tie break, Djokovic was THE MAN :) And although he probably wasn't the favoured player to win this tournament, he clearly deserved to win. And I'm glad I witnessed every moment of it, because it wasn't a touch on the Sharapova-Ivanovic match the day before.

Who says boredom does weird things to people? Haha.

Mine led me to discover a whole new Grand Slam experience and The Djoker :)

Perhaps it's true what they say. Because it is inevitably your absence that reminds me the most of you.

On my playlist, the ever-familiar strains of Zhou Jie Lun are abruptly interrupted by the familiar pelting of rain....pouring down yet again, and out of nowhere, I suddenly wonder how much colder it possibly is where you are right now....

I'm suddenly stirred by indescribable emotions.....a jolt of Deja Vu, perhaps?

An image of sitting on a bed, listening to 'Wo Bu Pei' over and over again, me demanding praises for the song in between pauses....that unspoken familiarity engulfing everything around.

I annoy myself, keeping a tab on my emotions only to have them fall haphazardly around me within seconds.

Because sometimes, for you, I would rather this always end at never.

And though time goes by, I will always be

In a club with you in 1973

Two Oh Oh Eight

So unlike the customary wraps of the past year that I have done all this while, my brain has, unfortunately, turned to mush this year.

All in all, I loved 2007, although the beginning was more of a down for me than an up. But towards the end, everything was great. Everything managed to straighten itself out eventually, and the last bit of it all....spending them with my beloveds again after so long was just the cherry on top of the icing.

Lurve ya alls~!

Then it was much-treasured Kch time with the lovelies.

This year's NYE outing was themed 'Shing's party at Kel's apartment', which turned out to be FAB! Well, in my opinion anyway. Me and Lai felt a tad guilty at the end, though, because we were supposed to drive into the city to meet up with peeps, but it was POURING and I mean POURRRINNNGGGG like mad. Hope everyone had fun still, though! :) And muchos gracias to Kel and Jane for throwing a greaaatttttt pary! Hehe.

Was a little off after that. And I apologise profusely to Manda for being a tad too chatty and driving home in a near stupor. HurHur. Also to Buaya whom I sent a text filled with what I am positive, was nonsense even though I don't remember a single thing.

Love all of you guys. Thank you loadddddssss for making the end of the year such a great one!

Heck, loads more to update on but I am soooo lazy. Oh well....till the next post....

Au revoir ;)

When I was mugging for exams, in the midst of moments when I was so utterly exhausted I wanted to just sleep forever, I would jump up in the midst and go NOOOOO!! The one thing I HAD to make sure I did was make it home and then to see my Heffas Hanna, Bao and Woogui, and Chekkie.

Exams have been over 2 weeks or so now, and have been passed.

And yet I'm feeling a tad apprehensive.

What will people see in the changed me?

Last night I discovered that I can no longer do this clubbing thing. I can't stand the taste of whiskey, nor take alot of alcohol, and I can no longer get into the hype of dancing.

So I have become a square. Haha. Hopefully a still stylish square though :)

And that's only one of the few things that have changed. Plus, my hair has been chopped off now. HurHur.

And above all, I really hope that I am doing the right thing. Even if there is still a sickening wrench in my heart whenever I see your name on the screen.

Work resumes tomorrow. Ah well~

Peace out, ppl :)

Grateful and relieved :)

Thank You

Darlings here I come~

My Fondest Memory

Tagged by Jenn A VERY LONG TIME ago. Sorry hun!! Hehe. It's just that I didn't want to simply write something down for this one.

So what is my fondest memory?

At this point, it's hard to say. Haha.

So here are a few of my fondest memorieS:



-- The High School days with Manda and the rest of the Point 2 girls. You know, the days when we sat in groups of 4s and would get scolded by Danny for not paying attention early in the morning. When we sniggered about X, Y, Z and I endlessly and went on quadruple 'dates' which involved movie-watching with no conversation. Lol. The days of dressing up for the most 'important' social event of the year, i.e. Interact Installation Night, giggling about Toyboys and the times that we took for granted because we saw each other every single day. The days of gossiping during History class and religiously memorising Moral definitions. The moments amidst mugging endlessly for exams and after that, SPM, where we managed to insert that little bit of colour into our lives.



-- Post High School Graduation, there were the holidays to look forward to each time. The X'mas holiday traditions which revolved around meticulous plans for NYE, which often resulted in disastrous outcomes, but which every single one of us treasure so much all the time. The numerous outings to the normal places where we hung around talking about things that began with 'Do you remember...' And there were, of course, the many alcoholic stints in between :) As much as we always stood around in circles contemplating about where to go next, agonisingly, because Kch is what we call, a hole....nothing much mattered because there was always the priceless company of friends.



-- CC Days.....the best days of my life. The day I met my TG girls was probably the luckiest, most wonderful day of my life, and I maintain that to this day. Amidst hair-pulling prior to exams, rotting in respective rooms mugging endlessly, memorising lines out of Bio textbooks, doing Math homework in the dead of night and freaking out for interviews, there were many irreplaceable moments that lie fondly within the heart. Laughing about 'Number 4s', practising for talent show dances, deciding what to wear to dances, DJ-ing at discos, tradition Saturday afternoon trips to town, note-writing in class and after class and just gossiping in the corridor or in rooms after curfew. Now I remember, why it was so difficult to part ways during that last day of school, and yet no matter how far apart we all are, you will always be in my heart.



-- I'm not sure how to name this particular memory in a chronological way, so I will just name it 'The Stints with Chekkie,Bao,Annie&Woogui'. Again, without you guys, I would never have survived a great many moments of my life, post-CC, and as much as this sounds phony, the pigging-out sessions around the Kitchen table, the trips to the various eating places, the West End outings, the moments just spent watching Korean movies in Chekkie's room or sappy shows in Bao's living room for the entire day, are amongst the happiest moments of that period of my life....happy moments that I would never have envisioned possible at that time. The silent emotional support you provided, or the time you took out of your busy lives to listen to me rant about my stupid issues is undeniably priceless, and I miss you guys every single day!!!

I always thought that blogging was something like the pensieve in Harry Potter...where you could pull out strands of memories to remember again.

And these, I will remember...forever :)

Tagged

Tagged by YL Hoo a verryyy long time ago

7 things to do before I die:

1) volunteer with Medecins Sans Frontieres
2) dance to ‘4 seasons of loneliness’ once more
3) live in Boston, or at least visit Boston
4) hang with my darlings like the old times again
5) learn hip-hop dancing professionally
6) go on an unlimited designer shopping spree
7) be a good doctor


7 things I won’t do even if it kills me:

1) smoke
2) engage in drugs
3) become a slob who has no sense of personal style
4) lose all contact with my bestie, my person and my girlfriends
5) try all the disgusting food that I have sworn never to eat
6) become really, REALLY fat
7) backstab my friends


7 things I do when I’m away from the public:

1) sleep
2) cry
3) reminisce about silly things in the past
4) shower?
5) Re-watch House and Greys over and over again
6) Listen to the same favourite song over and over again
7) Camwhore


7 favourite quotes & expressions:

1) REALLYYY?!?
2) Oh crap!!
3) *uncontrollable laughter at sarcasm or funny expressions*
4) ZOMG
5) *withering stare* Lols
6) Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
7) Victory comes to those who believe in themselves


7 favourite songs:

1) Wo Bu Pei – Zhou Jie Lun
2) 4 Seasons of Loneliness – Boyz II Men
3) My Place – Nelly
4) Qi Li Xiang – Zhou Jie Lun
5) Ni Bu Zhai – Wang Lee Hom
6) The Way I Are – Timbaland
7) Ayu – V.E.
(Yes I know my songs are all damn back-dated and weird)


7 things I’ll make you wish you didn’t do:

1) Tap me on the shoulder and poke my cheek with your finger when I turn around
2) Insult my best friends or anyone who really matters to me in my heart
3) Talk about me behind my back while pretending to be nice to me in my face, and let me catch you
4) Judge me, in any way at all
5) Swear at me while shouting at me in public
6) Insult my personal style
7) Hurt those whom I love

7 ppl to tag:

1) Jenn
2) Kim
3) Yeen
4) Manda
5) Cherie L
6) Cheek
7) Jane

Wo Bu Pei

I have reached a new level of addiction to Zhou Jie Lun's new song, even by my standards. Lol.

"If only you weren't Zhou Jie Lun..."

And I echo these thoughts, precisely.

Was it always meant to be of this surreptitious, clandestine manner?

An indifferent mask, displayed to the public....and yet, beneath it....a zillion and one secrets that we reverred in.

Because sometimes I wonder....if I were to bury my head in a hole in the ground so that I wouldn't be able to see you, would you pretend that you couldn't see me too?

Memoirs

Memory is a strange thing. It seems to capture images as a whole, refusing to omit the tiny, specific details that might, possibly....no longer be there.

And so it is that when I turn my head to the right towards the row of wooden bleachers next to me, I still half expect to see you, in all familiarity amidst the bouncing of the black rubber ball off the walls and the scuffling of court shoes on the wooden floors.

Or that I can still see, through the smoke and throngs of people pushing in front of me, your profile on the couch next to mine, your voice echoing through the incessant boom of loud music in my ears.

Oh how easy it is to OD on these images. These images that are now just pictures. Painted pictures breathing a life of their own...moving haphazardly through the sky. And in that brief moment that I reach out to touch them, they are gone.

Or not.

Because sometimes remembering will lead to a story. A story that seemingly lasts forever.

And that's what stories are for....for when all has disappeared, and there is nothing left that is tangible....except that story of my life.

Home Turf

There are certain meanings words cannot suffice.

Certain connections that need nothing to be said at all.

Such as the familiar feeling of being back on home turf.

And so it is that we keep plodding on, keeping this safe rift between us.

Because it is simply all for the best, really.

Sssshhhh

It doesn't matter if we will meet again
It doesn't matter if you will remember me
I just want to tell you a secret

I love you

Currently addicted to Zhou Jie Lun's theme song for his movie 'The Secret'. Plus the movie was amazingly good, unexpectedly...surpassed....my expectations. Or maybe it was just that bit of it that touched me.

Yes I know, I'm lagging.

Now I remember why I like Zhou Jie Lun so much :)