I've had a very enjoyable week indeed. Possibly a much better week than the last. And so much of it due to the fact that I am enjoying the GP placement SO much more than my previous rotation. So many times, when I find myself really, really enjoying a clinical rotation, doing well and being in the loop of focus, putting in productive days at the hospital / practice, I know over and over again that this (medicine) is what I am meant to be doing. No further qualms.
True, I have not done enough to know whether I prefer Surgery, want to maintain my High School dream of becoming a Cardiothoracic Surgeon, dapple in a more reward-seeking, business-minded path of General Practice, stick to my initial preference of General Medicine....it's still early days. So far the only thing I have done is cross an item or two off my list.
When Momo labelled me as 'a very focused person' earlier, I was slightly amused. I must be the least focused person in the world in terms of prioritising academic items for reading on the agenda. Yet, lately I have become better and better at harbouring emotions and controlling my daily life in a way that I only look at the priority that is staring me in the face, which leaves no time for silly mind games with myself and unnecessary emotional turmoils.
May not be perfect, but A for Effort, that one. Proud of myself, if anything.
And much to the pride of Hoo and JH, I have picked up regular visits to the gym again. Am trying to build up my stamina, if anything. But every time I fall into this regular habit of gymming, along with it comes the ever-existent paranoia that nags me from time to time, making me obsessive about my weight, the possibility of piling on fat above fat, that I might just morph from losing all my muscle mass to the skinny minnie I am now to untoned AND bulky. It doesn't help either that I am hopeless at diet control.
On a happier note, will be looking forward to several CNY get-togethers to attend this weekend. With some reading and catching up on work slotted in, hopefully.
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